Suni

Bereavement

Bereavement is perhaps the most difficult of human conditions to come to terms with. The loss of a loved one causes more emotions than probably any thing else that happens in our lives. It is not just the number of those emotions, but the mix of them which causes so much distress and pain. We may feel a mixture of shock, anger, grief, guilt, loneliness, depression and many others and with any of these seemingly being triggered without warning it's no wonder that people do feel the pain of death. This is not just something we say, it is real, we really can experience this as painful sensations in our body as it struggles to make sense of what has happened.

Traditional therapy tells us that we must go through several distinct stages of bereavement and that these can. and often do take years to work through. But it doesn't have to be like this many of us will have come across people who seem to cope much better. This doesn't mean that they are uncaring, or that they didn't love as deeply, it simply means that they have learned to deal with the bereavement, not just to live with it.

For many people the first emotion that they have to deal with is shock. Many of us can remember the time we found out that our loved one had died in so much detail, the place, the time, the situation, the people, even the smells and sounds. The shock was so great that the event has literally been imprinted on us in the same way that a physical injury stays with us. We all know with a physical injury that the cut may be on our leg, but if we move our waist in the wrong way, it will pull and cause pain. Emotional injuries work in exactly the same way, something seemingly unrelated will trigger the shock again and in the same way and with the same intensity.

As with most things that we address with EFT, we cannot change what has happened, but what we seek to do is to change the way that you feel about it. Removing the hurting part of a memory effectively cleanses it so that it doesn't hurt any longer. We don't try to help you forget - but to remember in a different way. The end goal though is more than this - once the pain has been taken away you can begin to remember the good things, the shared moments, not just to offer relief but to allow the love back into your life.

If you would like to discuss how EFT could help you with your bereavement, no matter if it happened recently or many years ago call me for a confidential assessment to see how EFT can work for you.